Hello, My Name Is Judgemental Asshole


We all have deeply held beliefs we are passionate about. I have many. They don’t always line up with each other, but they make sense to me and that’s what counts.

But every once in a while, hearing those beliefs expressed makes you feel like an ass.

Treating each other well is one of my fundamental tenets. It’s why I support equality, civil rights and good manners. It’s why I haven’t let my son join Boy Scouts. I object to their treatment of homosexuals. I recognize they have every right to enforce that policy. They are a private organization with a religious base. I also have a right not to support them. Which I exercise. Vocally.

Enter the asshole.

Today, as I waited for my kids to get out of school, a young man was wearing an Eagle Scout uniform and being harangued by a mother (not his own, obviously) about the policies of Boy Scouts. This poor kid was near tears as the grown woman continued to shout at him. So I calmly intervened. (Lie. I yelled.)

“How would you react if this young man were being harassed for being gay?” I turn to the kid, “I’m not saying you’re gay or anything.”

She looked at me, blankly.

“He is not responsible for Boy Scouts. He’s a kid. It’s not his fault. Leave him alone.” I stomped off to wait for my kids. She left. So did the kid.

And fuming, I heard myself delivering that same rant. Multiple times. Because the policy pisses me off.

But it isn’t the kids fault. So all those times I refused to buy popcorn? All the times I ranted and raved, once in front of a woman I didn’t know had a son in Scouts? I was just as horrible as that lady.

I am so ashamed. SO ASHAMED! I could have (and will in the future) make a cash donation to the troop. It benefits the boys directly and isn’t funneled through the organization. Perfect compromise. I will also quit hollering about a policy I find offensive. Unless I come face to face with an actual representative of the national organization. Then I reserve the right to go completely mental on his ass.

I know several great parents whom I admire and respect that have sons involved in Scouting. Their sons are great kids. And they truly enjoy it. So who am I to crap all over that experience? I come back to a post I put on Facebook that probably offended some people. ( I know, you’re shocked.)

“Political views are like genitalia. Everyone knows you have them, but only a select few are interested in seeing them.”

I need to shut the hell up, lest I become what I hate.

One response »

  1. I’m in the same boat as you——my hubs made me buy popcorn from my nephew whom I love dearly, AND he made me promise not to lecture. Hopefully, my nephew will not turn out to be gay, and have to face getting kicked out of the organization he loves. 😦

    To be clear, if he is gay, I will love and support him, just the same. It would be a shame, however, if he loved an organization that ultimately shuns him. I think a direct Troop donation is probably best, and will do more for the boys directly. And, the popcorn is meh.

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